Gledwood's Drug Confessions: A Heroin Addict's Blog
Tuesday, 2 January 2007
On Reflection
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: for the Death Penalty for Paedos
Topic: Life Story

ON REFLECTION, I’m starting to feel a little paranoid about the post I put in the other day “five things it’s worse to be…” My point there was supposed to be (and I was writing to myself as much as to anyone else, I don’t call this “Confessions” a “blog-journal” for nothing) — even if you’re a hopeless junkie (and drug addicts adore feeling sorry for themselves) you can count your blessings. Many of us are relatively well in mind and body (I’ve been more ill mentally than I ever was physically).

   What I wasn’t trying to do was to demonize AIDS patients as comparable to rapists or Satanists. All the five points have my sympathy, that was the point of the piece. I wasn’t ridiculing anyone.

   As for the sex offenders, we hear so much about paedophilia etc I feel almost afraid to go near people’s kids sometimes… talking to a young child, what if people get the wrong idea? It’s sad but like many others I suppose, I feel I must stay away.

   A case in the news recently involved a very young little girl having a bath upstairs in her home. A man sneaked in the open front door, took the child out of the bath, ran outside with her, drove off and abused her in some way, dumping the poor frightened child the other side of town some half hour or so later. He got sentenced to life — good. That was a truly monstrous thing to do.

   When I was about ten (and I had very blond and distinctive hair) I used to go to a railway footbridge to wave a Silver Jubilee Union Flag at the trains which would honk loudly in reply (especially the express trains). One day I had only just got there when a man I had never seen before approached me from the other side of the bridge, called me by my right name and said he was supposed to collect me.—!!

   I told him he’d got the wrong person and this man (very nervous-looking the whole time) went away. And I went safely home. I’ve wanted to get that off my chest for some time. Every time I think of it that memory does my head in. I wonder: what if? (This guy looked all wrong. He had nervousness in his eyes like he feared what he was about to do. I saw that. No way on earth was I going with him.)

   Well. What can I say? Telling that story makes me feel kind of shaky inside. I ask myself whether he really did have badness on his mind... I do feel sorry for people who feel compelled to do stuff like that. I know how it feels to be compelled to do something others disapprove of because I take hard drugs. I always used to be anti the death penalty. Now I believe it might be kinder to kill the paedophiles off and put them out of their misery.


Posted by gledwood at 1:07 PM GMT
Updated: Tuesday, 2 January 2007 1:12 PM GMT

Tuesday, 2 January 2007 - 10:44 PM GMT

Name: "ggirl"
Home Page: http://ggirl.tblog.com

Try not to feel sorry for them.  Your compulsions seem to hurt only you.  Pedophiles alter people's lives forever.  I was sexually abused by a family member, beginning sometime prior to the age of 5.  I'm married now and things are good, but I will never know what it's like to *not* be used, to *not* be controlled and terrified by someone who I was unable to defend against.  Don't feel sorry for them.

Tuesday, 2 January 2007 - 11:49 PM GMT

Name: "mousie"
Home Page: http://plumpiemousie.blogspot.com

very difficult subject...I quite understand how somebody who has been abused feel...I quite understand how they need to revenge in a way...but I agree with you it's so difficult nowadays ..I was working with young boys and girls and yes in the last years we had to pay attention to any tiny gestures...society is so suspicious...i know we have to be very ceareful, i know but years ago I could take a pupil in my arms if she or he was sad or frightened...the last years it was impossible...by being so careful we lose that natural tendency to be physically helpful...difficult to explain in english for me...i mean in our society if you are "physical" if you naturally touch people, take them in arms kiss...you are so easily suspected of so and so...

and about paedophiles they must absolutely be cured but I'LL ALWAYS BE AGAINST CAPITAL PUNISHMENT...it's completely unefficient, in countries where it exists crimes aren't less numerous...and we humans have no right to kill somebody else whatever he did...sentenced to jail for life yes...but no death...

oh dear...i must make my brain work to explain all this in English...but those conversations are so interesting...

see you dear, take care

love from mousie

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 9:57 AM GMT

Name: "ruth"
Home Page: http://ruth-boofie.blogspot.com/

Such an emotive subject. Unfortunately because of our worries on this subject it has affected us all. I remember Mick telling me once that a little girl had fallen off a swing where he was working and whereas in the past he would have rushed over to help her he hesitated for fear of his actions being misunderstood. One of our daughter works at a school and she cannot even take a childs earrings out as it could be classed as abuse. Unfortunately the REAL abusers have destroyed what what once our human caring attitude towards our fellow man.

Take care of yourself

Keep smiling

Rx

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 10:14 AM GMT

Name: "ruth"
Home Page: http://ruth-boofie.blogspot.com/

A very emotive subject. Unfortunately the abuser has destroyed mans ability to show compassion to his fellow man. Mick told me once that a little girl fell off a swing where he was working and whereas at one time he would have rushed over to help her he hesitated for fear of his actions being misunderstood. One of our daughters works in a scholl and can't even take out a childs earrings as it would be classed as abuse! Sad...so sad.

Rx

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 10:17 AM GMT

Name: "ruth"
Home Page: http://ruth-boofie.blogspot.com/

Sorry about the double comment. I thought the first time it had been swallowed by cyberspace so tried to rewrite it.

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 10:32 AM GMT

Name: "Holly Blue"
Home Page: http://www.holly-blueeyes.blogspot.com

Hi Gled....

I've been trying for a good few days to leave a comment but not had much luck...lets hope I'm successful today.

You know, you have a very very busy mind don't you...mine is the same, and there are times I get paranoid about things I say and do...I find it quite a pain in the arse and suffer a lot with anxiety where I think and worry too much.  

Don't worry Gled... I don't think you came across derogative at all in that post....you go ahead and say what's on your mind or in your heart...it's good to have somewhere to empty your thoughts, it's a release for you, relax and let it flow...I for one will not judge you.  ;)

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 10:44 AM GMT

Name: "Holly Blue"

Well smack me on the arse and call me Hilda!!!! I'VE ACTUALLY MANAGED TO LEAVE A COMMENT!  DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH TROUBLE I HAVE HAD! 

........I'm gonna leave another..... just simply because I can!  Oooo Get me!

I very much like the new colours...much easier on the eye.  And tell if you will....who is that a picture of sat there looking all chilled in the grass....would it be you Gledwood in one of your more relaxed moments or just a random bloke? :) 

I'm going now and will positively wet myself if I have been successful a second time...there's a thought for you!  Have a good day...and go easy on yourself.

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 2:20 PM GMT

Name: "Holly Blue"

I had an hour spare with a choice between a quick nap (Oh how I love my sleep!!) or a read of some blogs....I chose to read, and started here....and didn't get much further.  I read from the begining...and I still want to read more but have run out of time! I feel like I'm getting to know you a bit now.

Keep blogging Gledwood....You're a great writer and your honesty is admirable. 

 

HBE ;)

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 8:08 PM GMT

Name: "Gledwood"
Home Page: https://gledwood.tripod.com/blog

No, I've been asked that before. It's not really me. The whole thing is a template from "tripod" the people who gave me the web space. (Tripod is part of Lycos, the search engine, which incidentally went "down" for hours on end yesterday, taking my email and my blog with it!) He does vaguely look like me though.

Vaguely.

!

G

Wednesday, 3 January 2007 - 8:43 PM GMT

Name: "ruth"
Home Page: http://ruth-boofie.blogspot.com/

Hi again,

Meant to say I hope you're managing to get into my blog a bit easier now; I've checked all my "permissions" and they all say that it's totally public so don't know what the problem has been. Mind you it takes me ages to get into your blog too; a bit of blogworld incompatability I guess but I shall persevere; have just seen that I've missed loads of your posts cos my shortcut was just taking me to your pre christmas post; have caught up now though. Lots of interesting insights on things. Right I'll see if I can manage to post this comment

Rx

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